The Autopian asks the big question: do you have a favourite Shatchback?
It’s nearly sixteen years since Petrolblog introduced the world to the Shatchback. OK, that’s not strictly true; the Shatchback existed, it just didn’t have a proper name.
As a reminder, a Shatchback is a four-door saloon based on a small hatchback. Think Ford Focus saloon, Peugeot 306 saloon, Renault Mégane Classic, Volkswagen Derby or, the Shatchback overlord that is the Vauxhall Belmont.
They tend to look rather awkward, like something with a pretty face that’s ill at ease with its posterior. Like a Tudor house with a white UPVC conservatory. Or a Lamborghini Miura with a campervan conversion.
For a brief moment in time, the Shatchback captured the imagination of a small corner of car Twitter. People would email me photos of horror stories they’d spotted in sunnier climes, while others would post them online with the hashtag #Shatchback. Some would misspell it, omitting the ‘t’, which still works, I guess.
It became a franchise, of sorts. Several posts contained images of cars that were definitely not safe for work. The automotive afterthought had struck a chord. But that was a long time ago.
So imagine my surprise when I spotted that the automotive media powerhouse that is The Autopian had crowbarred open the crypt and dusted off the Shatchback for a new generation. Big thanks to Antti Kautonen for the love.
The Autopian link prompted me to revisit the archive and tidy a few ancient formatting horrors from the WordPress-to-Craft move. The writing remains largely as it was, for better or worse, but the spacing, typos and general wonkiness should now be slightly less terrifying than the cars themselves.
Start with the original Shatchback rant, then proceed carefully through the later instalments. Some images may distress younger readers, pets and anyone with fond memories of the Vauxhall Belmont.
- Shatchbacks: Give them the boot
- Shatchbacks 2: Judgment Day
- Shatchbacks 3: Rise of the Machines
- Shatchbacks IV: Salvation
- Shatchbacks V: The Final Frontier?
- Shatchbacks VI: Hatchbacks Under Siege
- Shatchbacks VI: Return of the Shedi
- Shatchbacks VIII: The Dark Nights Return
Huge thanks to The Autopian for sending fresh victims this way. Don’t have nightmares.
Footnote: I turned to Google AI to ask the question: what is a Shatchback? This was the response:
‘A shatchback is an automotive slang term – popularised by car enthusiasts and motoring journalists – used to describe a hatchback car that has been awkwardly modified to look like a traditional saloon/sedan.’
It adds: ‘The word is a portmanteau of “sh*t” and “hatchback”.’
And finally: ‘Petrolblog dedicated an entire article series to mocking their compromised, unproportional aesthetics.’
