The hunt for Sao Penza

According to howmanyleft.co.uk, there is only one Sao Penza left (legally) roaming the streets of Britain. That's right, just one Sao Penza. And you'd forgotten all about them, hadn't you?

When I wrote this article last year, I had no idea that the Sao Penza was so close to extinction. But for all its faults and obvious flaws, the fact remains that as a nation we're down to a single Sao Penza. Granted, there appear to be three laid up, but I think we can safely assume that these are probably sat surrounded by weeds, spiraling into the abyss, never to feel the warmth of Britain's tarmac again. I'm also pretty certain that the last time I visited the Beaulieu Motor Museum, there wasn't a Sao Penza mingling with the F1 cars or sat alongside a Ford Sierra Cosworth.

So the final Sao Penza is the last bastion of cars based on the fifth generation Mazda 323. A dying ember of South African cars that just happen to be named after industrial Russian cities. For these two reasons alone, we owe it to ourselves to save the final Sao Penza from impending extinction. Michelle Newman would be so proud.

People of Britain, it is your duty to hunt down the final Sao Penza. It is out there somewhere and we mustn't sleep until it has been found. Check underneath your beds, look down the back of your sofa or have a rummage around in your shed. Someone knows the whereabouts of the final Sao Penza.

If you see it, resist the urge to trap it in your oversized butterfly net. Simply take a photograph and send it to PetrolBlog. There's a packet of Hobnobs in it for you. We just need proof that the Penza is still on the road, so a valid tax disc or dated image will suffice. Any Mazda 323s masquerading as Sao Penzas won't count - we don't believe in badgers at PetrolBlog.

Of course, if you happen to own the final Sao Penza on the road, let us know. We'll salute you and will reward you with some delicious chocolate coated Hobnobs for going beyond the call of duty to keep a legend* of our roads alive.

So, keep 'em peeled for the elusive Penza...

*an overused term that doesn't strictly apply here.