Lessons from the Michelin Man
When the lovely people at Michelin Tyres asked me if I'd like to join them for a day at the Porsche Experience at Silverstone, it took all my willpower not to reply with a simple, "does the Pope poo in the woods?", but instead I responded in a much more civilised manner. But "Hell Yeah" would sum it up pretty well.
The Porsche Experience does exactly what it says on the tin. Using the company's very own facilities at Silverstone, you get to experience the full range of Porsche products on all number of road surfaces and under varying degrees of weather conditions. The short but tricky off-road course was despatched with relative ease by the Cayenne leaving me with an almost anti-climatic feeling when getting out of the car. For sure, the Cayenne is supremely capable and it is a crying shame that for the vast majority of owners the closest they'll get to off-road driving will be mounting the kerb outside the school gates. But unlike my Land Rover 110, there's no sense of achievement, no drama and no obvious signs of imminent death should you make the wrong decision as you descend the one-in-one hill.
Of greater relevance to me was the chance to drive a Cayman, Boxster and 911 around the Porsche test track. With an experienced instructor by your side, you're invited to test the Porsche on a specially built track designed to replicate standard UK roads. That means tight and sweeping corners, crests and camber changes. Around the track are further areas where specially constructed surfaces simulate all manner of weather conditions. That means ice, rain, snow, low friction and a kick-plate designed to make the Porsche lose rear wheel traction, forcing you to correct the spin or lose control of the car. Even under controlled conditions, the loss of control is a genuinely unnerving experience, with a successful correction leaving you with a sense of achievement. Of course, an unsuccessful attempt has the reverse effect and leaves you reflecting on the consequences out on the open road.
As a petrolhead, driving some of Stuttgart's finest metal around a test track neighbouring Britain's F1 track is a very pleasant way of spending the day. I will forever be grateful to my instructor Colin who patiently taught me the art of perfecting 'getting the backend out' in a 911. I am also grateful to Michelin Tyres for the invite. I was truly impressed with the off-road abilities of the standard road tyre and also the way in which their tyres stand up to abuse on the test track. You can never underestimate the need for a quality tyre. As the one thing that connects your car to the road, a tyre should never be bought on price and quality is of paramount importance.
So it saddened me to hear through chatting with Michelin's engaging PR Manager Paul Cordle that for many people, the thought of buying anything other than budget tyres is out of the question. Paul spoke of one incident where a man arrived at a tyre fitters and asked for a set of their cheapest tyres. His rationale for buying cheap? The car in question was the family runaround and only being used for his wife to go shopping in...as well as take the kids to school? Seriously, some people's priorities are all wrong. I'm guessing he wouldn't think twice about upgrading his Sky TV package should the prices rise, but spend a few extra notes on decent tyres? Never.
But here's the thing. If my 450 mile round trip to Silverstone is anything to go by, this nation's attitude to motoring has become rather relaxed. I'm not for one minute going to claim a holier than thou approach to driving, but I hope I have a degree of common sense and a certain level of courtesy when out on the road. I'm also going to caveat my comments by admitting this is based on one single journey on one single day, but I saw enough to make me believe that standards are dropping.
Take for example, the guy in the Rover 600 who clearly believes that travelling in the middle lane on a near-empty M5 is perfectly acceptable. Mr Rover Man wasn't the only one, I gave up counting how many more I experienced on the way home, with the M5 playing host to the worst offenders. OK, so this isn't dangerous or life threatening, but it shows a lazy and ignorant approach to driving and a lack of courtesy towards other road users.
Then there was the guy in the MK5 Golf who point blank refused to move over as I tried to enter the M4 from the A419. Despite having two lanes of empty asphalt on his right hand shoulder, he clearly couldn't bear the thought of me joining the motorway in front of him. Come on man, would you slam the door in my face if I was following you in to the office? Actually, don't answer that - you probably would.
But these incidents are minor niggles compared to some of the other horrors I saw out there. Take the Peugeot 1007 tailgating a Mercedes Vito on the M4. Now I'm not sure if the Peugeot 1007 comes with X-Ray specs enabling the driver to see through the van in front, but I am certain that the brakes will be as useful as a chocolate teapot if the driver was forced into an emergency stop. I'm equally certain that the 'Baby on Board' sticker on the back window would be an irrelevant distraction for the emergency services being faced with the task of cutting the bodies out of the wreckage.
And speaking of 'Baby on Board' stickers, surely it says something about this nation's attitude to driving when a sign originally developed as a safety device has been reduced to little more than a cheesy accessory purchased through Halfords? Today, the sign has been rendered useless by the countless 'Princess on Board', Baby I'm Bored' and 'Maddison on Board' variations.
I could go on and mention the near-death experience encountered by a motorcyclist on the M4. Only the rider's sharp thinking avoided being knocked sideways by a Megane driver who seemed oblivious to the rider in the outside lane. I could also mention the LED-emblazoned Audi driver whose life is just so frantic that he is forced into overtaking on double white lines on the A420. Surely being alive is a simple pre-requisite when trying to achieve more photocopier toner orders than last month? But for fear of sounding like a Mary Whitehouse of the car world, I'll draw a line under my observations and move on.
But how and why has this rather relaxed and ignorant approach to motoring come about? One theory is that the huge advances in car safety have had a paradoxical effect on the way we drive. Our cars have become an extension of our living room - a safe and secure cocoon seemingly free from danger. Road noise is muted by a layer of sound-deadening, whilst the elements are softened by thick glass, aero wipers and climate control. I have a feeling that if we were all forced to drive around in my Citroén AX GT. Vulnerability and fragility come as standard and you treat the road with complete respect. But in truth, perhaps the driving test should include the likes of the simulated hazards laid out at the Porsche Experience. I guarantee that everyone will come away with more respect for the road and how to drive.
I'll close with this conclusion. I've seen the difference a good tyre can make and it isn't just about cornering ability, road noise and having a brand name on the side of the rubber. Choosing the right rubber might literally be the difference between life and death. If that isn't enough for you, then perhaps just listen to Michelin when they say that a decent tyre can save you money in the long run. Maybe even enough for a new set of Lexus-style lights. Or a year's subscription to Sky TV.
Many thanks to Michelin Tyres and the team at the Porsche Experience Centre at Silverstone for a great day.
Related Links:
Michelin Tyres: http://www.michelin.co.uk/tyres/
Porsche Experience, Silvestone: http://www.porsche.com/silverstone/
