PetrolBlogPetrolBlogPetrolBlogPetrolBlog
  • Home
  • 70s cars
  • 80s cars
  • 90s cars
  • 00s cars
  • Manufacturers
    • CITROËN
    • PEUGEOT
    • RENAULT
    • Alfa Romeo
    • Audi
    • Dacia
    • Daihatsu
    • Fiat
    • Ford
    • Honda
    • Hyundai
    • Lancia
    • Matra
    • Mazda
    • Mercedes-Benz
    • Mitsubishi
    • Nissan
    • Opel
    • Proton
    • Saab
    • Seat
    • Skoda
    • Suzuki
    • Talbot
    • Toyota
    • Vauxhall
    • Volkswagen
    • Volvo
  • Features
    • 10 of the best
    • CarTunes
    • General Bunk
    • It’s time to appreciate
    • Major Waffle
    • New cars
    • Regrets
    • Reviews
    • Save Our Scrap
    • Shatchbacks
    • Shednesday
    • The Barn
    • Whatever happened to?
  • Garage
  • Shop
0

Will nobody think of the Nissan Almera Tino?

Published by Gavin Big-Surname at 8th April 2020
Nissan Almera Tino really on it

As the Nissan Almera Tino proves, 20 years is a long time in the car industry. One minute we’re being encouraged to load our little darlings into a mini-MPV, the next minute only a crossover will do.

Nissan was relatively late to the small MPV party – the Almera Tino arrived three years after Renault had blazed a trail with the Megane Scenic. Unfortunately, the Tino lacked the individuality of the Fiat Multipla, the flexibility of the Vauxhall Zafira, and the eccentricity of the Citroën Xsara Picasso.

In developing the Almera Tino, Nissan spoke to mothers, sports teams, gardeners and people who spend their weekends at B&Q to find out what they want from a car. Armed with this information, it’s surprising that the result was a little, well… meh.

Always somewhere

Nissan Almera Tino rear seats

It had the usual array of cupholders, storage spaces (20, if you’re counting), foldaway tables and individual rear seats, but aside from a clever multi-folding parcel shelf, removable baskets and an instrument panel designed to look like a personal stereo (remember those?), there was little to tear people away from other bulbous offerings.

In fairness, it was actually pretty decent to drive – a message Nissan hoped to ram home courtesy of some ‘on it’ press photos. Sure, it lacked the flair and verve of its somersaulting and double-fist-pumping namesake, but the Tino was more fun than an Almera-based MPV should be.

Cue cries from the Sunderland and Middlesbrough faithful of “Fat Nissan Almera, you’re just a fat Nissan Almera. Fat Nissan Almera, you’re just a fat Nissan Almera.”

Newcastle fans would respond with “We’ve got multi-link rear suspension, you’ve got Peter Reid.”

Rock you like a hurricane

Nissan Almera Tino dashboard

The Nissan Almera Tino’s fall from grace was almost as rapid as the Colombian footballer’s. Like so many cars of this ilk, the descent into the lower leagues of the Auto Trader classifieds was rapid and unforgiving.

Battle-scarred by years of jostling for position in the car parks of Mothercare and the Charlie Chalk Fun Factory, and with an interior soiled by the remnants of Happy Meals, boiled sweets and dog hair, the chances of finding a mint Nissan Almera Tino are slim. It will be easier to find a YouTube video showing a solid defensive display by Newcastle under the reign of Kevin Keegan.

It’s far from extinct, but there are just 33 for sale on Auto Trader, with prices ranging from £300 to £2,000. This £450 example is especially appealing, featuring, as it does, black steelies on one side and a pair of three-spoke wheel trims on the other.

Who decided that wheel trims that pay homage to three-spoke alloys would be a good idea? Probably the same person that believed Hurricane and Twister would be good names for trim levels.

Wind of change

Nissan Almera Tino review

Six years after its launch, the Almera Tino was gone with the wind. The Tino, along with the Almera, was swept away by the Qashqai and Juke, with Nissan all but turning its back on hatchbacks and MPVs. The spirit of the Tino lived on in the surprisingly good Nissan Note, while Nissan UK made a fleeting return to the hatchback sector with the Pulsar and its limo-like rear legroom and best-in-class elbow room.

Which leaves the Nissan Almera Tino to exist in a world of faded England car stickers, ‘baby on board’ hangers, missing wheel trims and insurance write-off categories. It will slip into the abyss unnoticed and without fanfare.

PetrolBlog is here to ensure that the Tino has a bookmark on the internet. But unlike Faustino Asprilla’s memorable hattrick against Barcelona, it’s unlikely to warrant repeat viewing. Still, it has to be better than a Qashqai, right?

Nissan Almera Tino with happy family
Nissan Almera Tino removable basket

Nissan Almera Tino rear view
Nissan Almera Tino and cyclists

Nissan Almera Tino cornering
Nissan Almera Tino at speed

More MPV nonsense

  • It’s time to appreciate the Mk1 Vauxhall Zafira
  • It’s time to appreciate the Hyundai Matrix
  • In defence of the Ford Fusion
Share
3


Related Waffle


Chris Barker CarTunes

CarTunes: a Mixtape by Chris Barker

Nov 9, 2020
Nissan Pao

The Nissan Pao is keeping me awake at night

Jun 25, 2020
2016 Nissan Note Black Edition

Nissan Note Black Edition: humdrum to holy moly

Jul 6, 2016
Nissan Pulsar 1.6 DIG-T 190 review

Minority Report: Nissan Pulsar 1.6 DIG-T 190

Oct 7, 2015

7 Comments

  1. Ben H says:
    8th April 2020 at 2:53 pm

    Never one for MPVs, but always this was the sportiest looking, it seems to share design language with the Almera GTi, especially in the form on the header picture: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/84/Silver_1999_Nissan_Almera_GTi.JPG

    Reply
    • Gavin Big-Surname says:
      8th April 2020 at 2:58 pm

      Love the Almera GTi.

      Classic advert: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9K_EkU9KZE

      Shut it!

      Reply
      • Ben H says:
        9th April 2020 at 2:17 pm

        Absolutely brilliant!

        Reply
  2. E-go says:
    13th July 2020 at 9:00 pm

    If the 5 door Almera mk2 was called Tino and the MPV as the 5 door Almera it could ‘ve been saved from the MPV humdrum cheesiness

    Reply
  3. Richard says:
    8th October 2020 at 7:37 pm

    Anything has to be better than a Qashqai, to be honest! But always had a soft spot for the Tino.

    Reply
    • Gavin Big-Surname says:
      9th October 2020 at 10:34 am

      Likewise. It will be hard to find a good one in years to come. That’s if anyone wants to find a good one.

      Reply
  4. Peter garratt says:
    28th April 2022 at 5:43 pm

    I have had a tino since 2001 the se model and have loved it the comfortable high seat position almost no driving fatigue reliability economy all good my moddl is a, 2001 year, insurance has been very reasonable also my family love travelling in at as well.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Club PetrolBlog membership

Club PetrolBlog

Latest PetrolBlog Videos:

https://youtu.be/1Gh6PY-yaAo
https://youtu.be/TR5YrjDwxLU

PetrolBlog in print!

Classic.Retro.Modern

Support PetrolBlog – Buy Stickers

  • Club PetrolBlog 2022 2023 Club PetrolBlog 2022/23 £18.00 £8.06
  • French Tat bumper sticker #FrenchTat bumper sticker £3.50
  • French Tat window sticker #FrenchTat window sticker £4.00
  • PetrolBlog sticker PetrolBlog car sticker £4.00
  • Too good to scrap bumper sticker TOO GOOD TO SCRAP bumper sticker/plaster £3.00
  • My car is the goat bumper sticker My car is the G.O.A.T bumper sticker £3.00
  • GOAT My car is the G.O.A.T window sticker £3.00
  • Too Good to Scrap TOO GOOD TO SCRAP window sticker £3.00
  • Tollfoolery sticker Tollfoolery car bumper sticker £3.50
  • Waffle & Bunk laptop sticker Waffle & Bunk laptop sticker £3.00 £2.50

What you’re saying

  • 26th March 2023

    Phillip Bailey commented on Whatever happened to the Chrysler Alpine?

  • 26th March 2023

    Phillip Bailey commented on Whatever happened to the Chrysler Alpine?

  • 22nd March 2023

    Barnaby Paul Smith commented on Whatever happened to the Invacar?

  • 16th March 2023

    Al M commented on This Renault 18 TL is a base-spec delight

  • 15th March 2023

    Carl commented on Real World Review: Renault Vel Satis

Fresh waffle

  • Toyota Camry XV20 manual0
    This ‘SELDOM SEEN’ Camry XV20 has a manual gearbox
    28th March 2023
  • Citroen AX Club PetrolBlog0
    Contain your excitement: Club PetrolBlog is back
    27th March 2023
  • Show us your Renault Safrane0
    Renault Safrane fails to make Car & Classic top 10
    15th March 2023
  • E36 BMW Compact for sale0
    I love my E36 BMW Compact – but it needs to go
    18th February 2023
  • Proton SE Aeroback for sale0
    Light up your life: 1993 Proton 1.5 SE Aeroback for sale
    9th February 2023
  • Citroen 2CV resting on the back of a truck1
    PetrolBlog: the chump is coming back
    13th May 2022
  • 2022 Dacia Jogger in Terracotta1
    The Dacia Jogger is a practical remix of the Matra Rancho
    14th December 2021
  • Toyota Land Cruiser No Time To Die2
    No Time To Die in a Toyota Land Cruiser
    13th December 2021
  • Fahnome Knight Rider build your own KITT0
    Sponsored: K.I.T.T. from Knight Rider is now available as a kit
    17th November 2021
  • Hyundai Heritage Series Grandeur rear light7
    The Hyundai Heritage Series Grandeur is the future we want
    12th November 2021

Newsletters

PetrolBlog
ABOUT | ADVERTISING / SPONSORSHIP | PRIVACY POLICY | TERMS & CONDITIONS | CONTACT US

The world’s least influential car blog since 2010.

Copyright © PetrolBlog.

0
We use cookies to offer you a better browsing experience and analyse site traffic. We also share information about how you browse our site with our advertising and analytics partners who may combine it with other information that you have provided to them or that they have collected for your use of their services.
Cookie SettingsAccept All
Manage consent

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously.
CookieDurationDescription
cookielawinfo-checkbox-analytics11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-functional11 monthsThe cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-others11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other.
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance".
viewed_cookie_policy11 monthsThe cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data.
Functional
Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features.
Performance
Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.
Analytics
Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.
Advertisement
Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads.
Others
Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet.
SAVE & ACCEPT