The motoring industry was plunged into chaos today amid fears that the Geneva Motor Show could be cancelled due to the coronavirus.
For now, the organisers are adamant that the show will go ahead, but some people are questioning whether the show is worth the risk. Without a hint of melodrama, the automotive editor at GlobalData said the show’s organisers are ‘caught on the horns of a dilemma’.
If the show doesn’t go on, there are concerns that the world will be unable to see out-of-focus photos of new cars that have been available in high-res on social media for the past fortnight.
There are also worries that a cancellation would lead to a global shortage of photos of new cars slightly obscured by the backs of people’s heads. The absence of an image with the filename Porsche_911_Turbo_Dutch_Journalist_Receding_Hairline.JPG would be a loss to society.
One motoring journalist, who doesn’t want to be named (possibly because he doesn’t exist), called on the organisers to see sense. “Without the Geneva show, how will I be able to discover how Lancia has managed to prolong the life of the Ypsilon for yet another year?” he moaned.
It was at this point that a colleague pointed out that Lancia isn’t at the Geneva Motor Show in 2020…
Health officials in Switzerland have said the risk of catching the coronavirus are lower than the chances of being injured by a German journalist pulling a wheeled flight bag. Ankles, shins, toes, knees and a person’s pride are most at risk.
Speaking from experience, one motoring journalist recalled a time when he was scythed down by an irresponsible journo. “I was minding my own business, walking between the SsangYong and Tata stand, when I failed to notice the wheeled terror approaching from behind.
“The next thing I knew, I was falling head first into the arms of the blonde show girl standing beside the Tata Manza. It was either that or risk bumping my head on the SsangYong Actyon.
“You could say that I was caught on the horns of a dilemma.”